17 Comments
User's avatar
Ryan Reed's avatar

Two references to noble food vehicles, I love it. Also, my high school served slices of Papa Johns every Wednesday and would put out a chaffing dish (unheated) of ranch dressing for all us beasts to ladle onto our struggling styrofoam plates.

Liz Cook's avatar

“(unheated)”. But what if it WERE

Abigail  O’Neill's avatar

Please tell your husband: I, too, cringed at the half-can issue, until I stiffened my spine and my resolve to approach it rationally: use the half-can with confidence, and put the remainder in a small plastic container, noting its contents and date, and give it top billing in your freezer. Then you're armed the next time you encounter the irritating issue. But the notation and freezer placement are critical; without those elements, all is lost. Signed, Sadder But Wiser

Paul Lukas's avatar

Not a fan of ranch dressing, but any day I can see cupping pepperoni is a good day.

Jason's avatar

My long-suffering spouse: DO NOT BUY THAT CANDLE!!!

Me: But Liz Cook said that...

Liz Cook's avatar

Starting a support group called S.O.S. (Spouses of Subscribers)

Travis Tozer's avatar

So will your next newsletter detail the creation of ranch flavored pizza for dipping into our pizza flavored ranch?

Tara Pollard McCambridge's avatar

I have heard many tales of the strangeness of Pizza Ranch, but the most intriguing one is that their fried chicken (also on the buffet) is actually amazing. Need more confirmation before my curiosity overcomes my dignity

Josh's avatar

Somebody give this woman a nobel or a pulitzer or whatever

Mommadillo's avatar

Holy shit! How did I not know about the Pizza Ranch “semen testing” deal?

I obviously need to keep subscribing for this kind of hard(see what I did there?)-hitting journalism.

Liz Cook's avatar

They have judiciously scrubbed every reference to the co-founder from their public storytelling. But Iowa remembers.

Brooksie's avatar

TIL there are people out there who are still not using the resealable metal tube approach to tomato paste to avoid the "open the can for a small amount" conundrum. Get your glutamates on demand, folks, the tube is where it's at.

Liz Cook's avatar

Brooksie, I’m willing to give the tube another try. But I’m concerned this will get in the way of my favorite hobby:

freezing the rest of a tomato paste can in an ice cube tray and then forgetting to transfer the cubes to a sealed container before they are freezer burned.

Mommadillo's avatar

Problem is it says right on the tube to use it within x days of opening. (Don’t remember the exact time, but it wasn’t very long)

Frank 4's avatar

I may need to revisit this, but it used to be 50 cents for the 6oz can and $4 for the 3oz tube.

I just did a quick google search and ot appears a 4oz tube is about $2 and a 6oz can is $1.

I don’t think I am ready for the tube.